I do not think we were created as whole beings, but fragments separated by both time and action. We have a whole life of opportunity to become whole, like a puzzle that determines its own pieces. And the pieces are us, our friends and family, neighbors, strangers, and pets – all the relationships that prove you even exist. I think it is unhealthy, and even inhuman to live a life without relationship. Because, without it we are incomplete.
We have our family- chosen for us, our friends- chosen by us, and our partner- mutually chosen. The one we spend the most time with holds most importance. Usually, family is where we learn to interact. (Which is why it’s important to repair these relationships to affect all others) When we are in a place of good social health, we have the strengthened ability to connect, and making friends becomes easy.
Usually it's the Husband/Wife that’s the most important. It’s with this person that we set the precedents for the practice and meaning of life. And our ability to love together will guide generations of life down the timeline. This special connection reflects life in its most objective form, and ultimately part of God itself. This is the magnitude of importance for the relationship with the one we choose to share most of our experience. The love we send out to the other will reflect in their heart, and it will imprint on the soul that lives there, and it will remain even after we are gone. Our children get it too, and the better we love them the longer we will live on.
The idea of a predetermined soulmate is just as logical as it is most unreasonable. The unquestionable wisdom of science tells us the chance of meeting our “true” soulmate is 1 in 10,000. Today, how many people wander aimlessly with sheltered hearts looking for “the one” and never seem to find it? Or worse, how many relationships end because the doubt of one becomes the reality of both? Maybe the true power of science lies in the ability to make up a statistic, only to document it being fulfilled.
Some of us consider ourselves the lucky ones. With the odds against us, it must have been pure luck to meet our 1 in 10,000 match. But, I don’t believe luck has anything to do with it. The only difference between someone who has met their soulmate and someone who has worked to become it, is the amount of time it took to realize they were meant to be. Then, very quickly, the degrading “what if” thoughts fade away, and all that is left is what is.
The expectation of love is quite possibly the greatest obstacle to finding it, keeping it, and sharing it. It’s nothing more than patterns through the eyes of a child. But, they become the rules for a matured mind. Imagine having the power to set that expectation as a mother, father, child, or friend. It is no different than the power to change the heart of the world. Love is not a currency. It is an experience that is meant to be shared. And the one who should experience it the most is you.
-Dr Adrian Gutierrez
